I know, I know, it sucks not being me.
But don't beat yourself up about it, because I'm going to show you all the good stuff-what to wear; what to drink; how to seduce women (and, when necessary, men); how to beat up men (and, when necessary, women); how to tell the difference between call girls and hookers (hint: when they're dead, they're just hookers) and everything about weapons, secret devices, lying ex-girlfriends, and turtlenecks. In a word How to Archer.
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