We all know the tale Hansel and Gretel, or The Sleeping Beauty, but yesterday's morality tales need serious updating.

Written by Australia's top comedy writers, each tale investigates a current topic that you can read to your kids to teach them about how morality actually works nowadays.

• Why it's alright to take money from dead people
• Why you shouldn't tell anyone about a horrible man if he's more powerful and well connected than you
• Why you should accept gold coins to not talk about rising water levels

Tales include:

The Woman Who Told the Truth

A woman travels from a distant land to visit the King to tell him of a terrible tale about one of his courtiers. Many years before, she says, this courtier was mean and horrible to her. He drank too much, and played weird vomiting games with his friends. He was not a good man, he was a very, very bad man. But when the woman told the King this, he went to the courtier to get his version of events. The courtier was not a charming man, he was not a smart man, but he was very well connected, and he told the King another tale about why the King should just ignore the woman. The King immediately banished the woman from the kingdom, and everyone lived happily ever after (except the woman).

Archimedes And His Bath

Archimedes was getting into his bath one day when he realised that the water level was rising higher and higher. Eventually he worked out what was happening - a large block of ice was melting into the bath. All he had to do was move the ice away from the stove. But just as he was about to do that, Archimedes was offered a gold coin from charming prince, and told that as long as he did nothing about the melting ice, he would be rewarded with lots of riches. Eventually Archimedes drowns, but he drowns and rich and happy man.

The Dead Man Thief

The tale of the peasant child who was discovered breaking into houses and taking money from families while they were at the funeral of their loved ones. He was discovered, and taken before the King for punishment, who instead promoted him to become a CEO of a major bank.