A God-free Haggadah for Jews who enjoy the cultural aspects of the religion but not so much the dogmatic ones. This fun and functional text combines traditions from all over the world with snarky wit, pop culture references, and surreal interactive rituals. The Unorthodox Haggadah
is a way to enjoy the strange and wonderful world of religion, while skipping the boring parts. Ritual is at the core of every culture, but people are no longer into dogma. This book offers the ritual with a hilarious, irreverent twist. It is genuinely funny, fun to flip through, and a riot to use at the seder. Make sure everyone around your table has a copy for the next Passover.
Let's begin by drinking the blood of a virgin lamb off the tip of a flaming golden scimitar. In the event that you've de-virginized your lamb or misplaced your scimitar, use wine.
Now, we toast the Israelites for rolling out of Egypt in time and generally being clever. Here are a few things they've invented since 1901: Jeans, lipstick, Hollywood, the fax machine, psychoanalysis, and the weekend. Thanks for getting us out of Egypt before shit got too real. Drink the second cup of wine while leaning to the left.
..".light up your seder."
"A cool, creative affront to Jewish grandmothers."
"Redefine Bitter Herbs...slightly insane."
"It's the Passover you never knew you always wanted...While there are many (many ) different Haggadah versions out there, this one is hands down our favorite (sorry Maxwell house). Genuinely funny, which puts it head and shoulders above 99.9% of the treacly crap people foist on unsuspecting seder guests to try to fool them into thinking they're actually enjoying themselves."