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When Everything Get's in the Way

When Everything Get's in the Way

by Mattia M Smith
Publication Date: 15/11/2013
What am I suppose to do with my life now." I thought. I really feel so hurt lost and I am depressed. I feel like my whole life was just snatched right from under me so quickly as soon as it began. I keep thinking to myself. "What kind of a person would or could do such a tremendous horrible act of indecency towards a person that suffers a mental disorder, or for that fact, what kind of a person would or could do such a horrible immoral act to anyone." "Why?" Was all I could ask myself. I have so many emotions going thru me right now. I feel right now that I don't know if it is easier to live or die. Today again I feel like I just want to close my eyes to sleep and never wake up again. But each day I still awake to the same hurtful pain in my heart and the same question is. "Why?" Then I began to question God. I thought to myself. "God, I know you're there. Because you keep waking me up each and everyday, apparently there is still work you have for me to do." "But what is it?" I wondered. "And why would GOD allow this to happen to me?" Why is it that God allows and let evil people get away with hurting innocent good by the heart people? I did not do anything to deserve this ill fate to be bestowed upon myself and my family. "Oh God, why has thou forsaken me!" I've been told by many people that my life is a testimony, and that I should write a book. Until now, I'd never given it serious thought, until this situation happened to me in my life. and now me writing this book is great therapy for me. It became an escape ans a way that allowed me to be able to mentally deal with this terrible tragedy that I had allowed to happen to me in my life. As I began to write this book, I began to see clearly my own mistakes that I'd made. I began to realize that it was not GOD that allowed this terrible act of indecency to happen to me. But it was me that had opened the path for this terrible kind of tragedy to occur in my life. I no longer wanted to blame God for my current situation. I now only wanted God to help me to come out of my current situation, and to help me to to restore my life. I believed in God, that he gave me and my family a gift, and I believe that when God gives a gift he makes no mistakes. Now here I am writing this book, I don't know what God has in store for me in the near future, but I do know that my desire while writing this book will be to share this kind of dramatic experience with everyone about my life, and in doing so. I pray that I can help someone else. Right now if you are experiencing or is going thru some tragic situation. or if you are feeling hopeless, loss and confused, broken heart or betrayed by someone you loved. I want you to know that you are not alone. and thank you for joining me on this wonderful long journey thru the roads of my life.
Poetry by individual poets
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