“It is the cruellest act to have your child snatched from your life, especially when they are just out of arm’s reach.”

Luke Batty was murdered on 12 February 2014. The fact that his father perpetrated this violence continues to horrify me. I am acutely aware of how privileged I am that I will never be able to comprehend the grief that Rosie Batty, Luke’s Mum, lives with.

I’m in awe of Rosie. Her courage and resilience, tested every day for a decade now, is astounding. The fact that she’s able to put one foot in front of the other in any capacity amazes me. That she has spent the past ten years advocating for change, telling her story countless times and giving of herself to support others who have experienced domestic and family violence? There just aren’t words for that.

This isn’t the kind of book you look forward to reading in the traditional sense. It is one that I preordered and began reading as soon as it finished downloading on my Kindle, though. If Rosie was going to be brave enough to tell me even part of her story, then I wanted to hear her.

“Nothing and no one can prepare you for the day after the worst day of your life. The sun comes up, but it’s not as bright. Life is never the same again.”

It was only once I started reading this book that I realised I’d gone about this backwards. I discovered A Mother’s Story, the book I should have read first. I want to get to know Luke, and learn more about Rosie’s life prior to the event that turned her before into after.

“While Rosie’s story is unique, unfortunately it is not an uncommon one. Worldwide, more than one third of women have been beaten, coerced into sex or abused in some way. On average, a woman dies violently every week in Australia, usually at the hands of someone she knows. Police get called to one domestic violence matter every two minutes. About one in six women and one in nine men experience physical and/or sexual abuse before the age of 15.”

Something that stood out to me about who Rosie is was the fact that, even in her memoir, she’s not making it all about her, when she would absolutely be justified in doing so. Instead, she shines a light on other women who have experienced domestic and family violence. Some, like Rosie, have become household names in Australia. Some, I was introduced to here.

One of my takeaways from this book was the gentle reminder that people’s responses to trauma vary and that’s okay. You don’t know how you will respond unless it happens to you. Let’s hope you never have to find out.

I have the greatest respect for Rosie. She’s real. She hates that you know who she is because of what happened to Luke. She’s authentic. She doesn’t gloss over the dark days and doesn’t big-note herself, although she certainly could with all that she’s achieved in spite of what life’s taken from her.

She’s someone who has found pockets of joy. She enjoys being in nature, she loves animals and she’s an accomplished swearer. I’ll probably never have the opportunity to sit down and talk to Rosie but, if I did, it would be a privilege to be able to laugh and cry with her. She sounds like a kindred spirit.

“Sometimes you just have to dust off your feathers, stretch your wings and find hope to take flight.”

Content warnings and my full review can be found on my blog.