Senior Moments is the go-to Christmas gift for all thoughtless children and shrewd seniors.

Have you had a Senior Moment yet? Maybe you know someone who's had a few?

Check this list to know for sure:

• You can remember being told the King was dead (George, not Elvis).
• You still say 'colour television', and you watch television on a television.
• Your home phone rings and you answer it. (And you still have a phone, not a 'landline'.)
• You boast about 'doing it' three times a night and that's just getting up to pee.
• You realise that your wardrobe has become ironic.
• You're not back in fashion, but you're hip. (And ironically, you now have an artificial hip).

If you answered 'yes' to one or more of the above, congratulations! You are officially a Senior and this book is here to guide you through your best years (i.e. the past).

Stroll, or maybe shuffle, down Nostalgia Avenue and bask in the glory of growing old disgracefully. (If you are a Young Person, this is the easiest Senior gift idea ever. You're welcome!)