“Oh no,” I thought all those years ago when this book first came out, “not another disaster beyond our imagination!”

(If you’re a ‘Phantom of the Opera’ Phan like I am, you know what that means.)

Afraid another remake or spoof on the Phantom theme has taken our beloved Angel of Music completely out of context from Gaston Leroux’s original novel and has mashed the story up beyond all recognition.

Let’s face it, we Phans take our obsession seriously and cringe when the Phantom is portrayed as some grotesque murderer with no soul, or when the storyline be it a new fan fiction or a screenplay bears practically no resemblance to the original tale, or dishonours Leroux’s literary memory.

So, when I heard about this title parodying all things Phantom, I was one disgruntled Phan. Of course, I shouldn’t judge another author’s style, especially as I never read one of Terry Pratchett’s books, but well, since I also take my fantasy seriously, Lord-of-the-Rings Fan-Seriously, that was another reason I was a little reluctant to go near any of his titles. However, like all curious bookworms, I finally had to see how bad Pratchett mangled Phantom, we Phans still like to read all Phantom books and watch Phantom films after all.

Well, I must admit, this book is quite sarcastically entertaining, you can’t help get sucked up in the lives of Terry Pratchett’s zany characters, but I digress...let me begin my critique by giving an outline of the plot set in the fantastic fictional realm of Discworld.

Agnes Nitt, a very sizable, talented girl from rural Lancre with a magical singing voice, (literally magical), desperately wants to recreate herself into a soulful gothic girl called Perdita X and leaves the country to try making her fortune in the great city of Ankh-Morpork. She has little success in the beginning, but when she sees a notice announcing there are auditions being held at the Ankh-Morpork opera house, well, she gives it a go...but there’s trouble afoot: a crazed Opera Ghost is roaming the place, causing murder, mischief and mayhem, and Agnes finds herself caught up in a drama almost as crazy as the operas produced on their stage.

Who comes to the rescue? Nanny Ogg and Granny Weatherwax, Lancre’s two most notorious, hilarious witches. One of their coven has married a king, so now their magical number three has been reduced to two. Nanny has the bright idea to initiate Agnes into their circle as she has magical potential, but is disappointed to hear Agnes has run off to be a singer. Then, the tea leaves tell a tale: the witches see Agnes is in danger, and since they have to go to Ankh-Morpork to settle an issue with a publisher about some royalties due them thanks to Nanny’s idea to publish a cook book, they decide to check in on Agnes, and they too are sucked into the mayhem.

As I said, this book was really entertaining, despite the fact it’s a complete spoof on the Phantom theme. The good thing is, it doesn’t make fun of the Phantom, but rather the whole culture surrounding opera, musical theatre, and of course, Phandom’s fascination with Phantom. Hey, while I take Phantom of the Opera seriously, I can also see the funny side of a Phan’s obsession, which Pratchett obviously had some fun poking fun at.

Here’s a quote just to give you an idea:

“The letter inside was on a sheet of the Opera House’s own notepaper. In neat, copperplate writing, it said:

Ahahahahaha! Ahahahaha! Aahahaha!
BEWARE!!!!!

Yrs Sincerely
The Opera Ghost

'What sort of person,' said Salzella patiently, 'sits down and writes a maniacal laugh? And all those exclamation marks, you notice? Five? A sure sign of someone who wears his underpants on his head. Opera can do that to a man.”

If you liked that, here’s another quote for you:

“A catastrophic curve, Mr Bucket, is what opera runs along. Opera happens because a large number of things amazingly fail to go wrong, Mr Bucket. It works because of hatred and love and nerves. All the time. This isn’t cheese. This is opera. If you wanted a quiet retirement, Mr Bucket, you shouldn’t have bought the Opera House. You should have done something peaceful, like alligator dentistry.”

The book reminds me of how Jane Austen popped the balloon on the Gothic novel culture of her time with her witty satire “Northanger Abbey”, deflating people’s romantic notions of secret passageways and haunted houses with a good dose of real life. Terry gives us a playful murder mystery romp through the Ankh-Morpork opera house, with some interesting turns and quite a few laughs along the way. I wish I could say more, but I might spoil the plot. He also interjects truthful observations about life and people all coated with bitter-sweet sarcasm.

The good thing is, you can jump right in and understand the story and can easily feel like you know the characters without having read any of the other books in the Discworld series.

About the adult-material rating I usually give in my reviews: there’s nothing overtly graphic in this book, but there are the unavoidable double entendres since it appears authors aren’t deemed ‘successful’ unless they make some attempt at bawdy humour, and this book was written as a comedy, sooo.... At least, this book is pretty tame when compared with what is considered ‘racy’ nowadays.

So Terry, I give you four stars, you made me smile and see the funny side of Phandom. I’d give you the full five if it wasn’t for the fact I’m still a ‘serious minded’ Phan.

(I also hear Terry published on a parody on a Faustian theme in another of his Discworld books, hmm, another one of my serious obsessions, I might have to check that out too...)

If you’re looking for an entertaining read, ‘Maskerade’ certainly is one book to consider.