The Holy Bible of Bad Feelings returns! Longtime bipolar idiot Sam Pink brings you right back to the beginning with this remastered edition of his first underground hit. Find out why it would be great to get accidentally killed by a bus. Find out how to perform hardcore sex and never have any fun. Find out why it would be better if your mom was a Ugandan hooker. And find out how to fill your mouth with confetti before blowing your own head off. Because a dead horse isn't ever fully beaten. Because when you get to Hell there will be a seat saved for you. Because you can't afford too many hellos. Because every time you come home, you stand in the door way and think, "It's time for a monster to eat me now." And then a monster eats you! Be brave enough to read this book. Be brave enough to clone yourself then kill the clone and eat it.