1. Lion dentists.

2. Creepy crawlies wearing wigs.

3. Marmite.

Things Wilf is worried about now:

4. The most evil man in the world.

5. Actually, anyone named Alan.

6. Alan deciding to become a pirate and destroy the world.

Alan is Wilf's self-styled evil lunatic next-door-neighbor. He has a grumpy robot sidekick and a silent, right-hand-dog, Kevin Phillips. All in all, he is kind of ridiculous. But when Alan decides that pirating is an excellent way to destroy the world, Wilf knows he will have to overcome his fear of parrots and walking the plank to stop him . . .