Emperor Norton is a 19th Century folk hero legendary for his charisma in the most charismatic city in the world - San Francisco. Prospering as a merchant for years, an ill-timed investment wiped away his fortune. After a short hiatus he re-emerged, penniless yet undefeated, as the self-proclaimed Emperor of the United States. Marching around in his glorious uniform, he dutifully kept the people of San Francisco delightfully amused. Even to this day, his jocund spirit parades around the city in the merry memories of his storied life.

Of the many myths and tales of his life, this ballad was mysteriously discovered in a bottle. However, nobody knows whether it was a bottle washed up on the shore or a bottle passed around in a bar. Let us suppose it is more to the lore!

In the spirit of Sir John Falstaff, Don Quixote, Ignatius Reilly and all the people who bring joy and merriment into the world, Garrett Buhl Robinson offers 2040 rip-snorting lines of hilarious verse in The Ballad of Emperor Norton.




Table of Content




Prologue



Emperor Norton's Command




Part I - Emperor Norton Saves San Francisco



The Long Arms of Emperor Norton
Emperor Norton Saves San Francisco
Emperor Norton's Theory of Gravity




Part II - Emperor Norton vs. the Diabolic Machine



Norton Invents the Washing Machine
Parading with the Parrots
Taking a Stand against Exploitation
Rallying his Troops
The Siege of the Fortress of Oppression
The Fearsome Battle




Part III - The Trial of Emperor Norton



Emperor Norton Plays the Market
Emperor Norton in Court




Epilogue



Emperor Norton's Everlasting Day