This book reveals personal details about the author’s relationship with his secretary, Threnody Higginbottom (whom he addresses as “Miss Smith” around the office). Threnody files everything under M for miscellaneous.

There’s also some quite startling stuff within these covers (stuff you’ll hardly believe) on, for instance, James Bond in retirement and what to do with red wine. .

And if you know somebody in hospital buy this book for them. They will empathise with the author’s experiences and his views about hospitals; how, from the moment you find your theatre gown won’t close down the back, the hospital authorities are out to humiliate you.

And learn how the West has tried to deliver vowels to vowel-starved eastern European countries with towns named Sjlbvdnzv and Grzny – as well as to Wales with places like Ffwgr and Ffwrrm.

For the “terribly shy” there are instructions regarding… well, you know, um, well, s*x . The author provides some basic guidelines on how to hit it off with the opposite s*x.

Read about the admirable creativity of journalists when working on their claim sheets for expenses.

There’s a lot on sport and on hiking too, including some quite adventurous stuff, like the day the author assaulted Everest – and summited. (“Oh, the noise. And the people!”)