The time of our lives :

I played Football with Osama Binladen,

Went shopping with Idi Amin,

Had Coffee with Mohammed Ali,

Dated the beautiful stewies

Considered living a life without feet,

Witnessed the worst Tri Star disaster,

Lived the Holy Mosque hijack,

The Death of a Princess saga

Charles & Diana’s visit and so much more and it’s packed with laugh-out-loud moments you won’t believe. I would go back tomorrow, would you?

He said he would make my life a living nightmare, a burning hellfire, filled with extreme pain and intolerable suffering. That’s ok mate, I smiled, I’m from Barnsley, I’m used to it.

I Inhabited the territories covered by this book for over a decade, providing ample pain and experience to produce this work. I drank coffee with Princes and Kings, played football with Osama Bin Laden went shopping with Idi Amin, 80 lashes for being there, learned Arabic and made every effort to integrate. I loved Saudi and began to believe my own hype, “I am not a foreigner, I am a son of this country”.

Filled with laugh-out-loud humour, mysterious untimely deaths, bribery, corruption, abuse, physical and mental torture, degradation, sex, brutality, the Hijacking of the Holy Mosque, squandered oil revenue totalling billions, The Tri-Star Disaster, the “Death of a Princes” documentary and its fallout, Football with Osama Bin Laden, Shopping with Idi Ami, Royal revelations, rape, ruin and absolute despair, all interwoven into the revelations of a lifetime.

Although I am now back in the UK, when daylight has gone and an unexpected knock rattles the door, a familiar apprehension returns. It is the cold, stark, tingle, of the fear of the unknown and instinct still forewarns, that despite thousands of miles between myself and those fanatics abroad - I cannot help but wonder, 'Is that terrible nightmare about to haunt me once more?’ Not for the faint-hearted but if you or any of your colleagues have ambitions of employment in the Middle East, you may just want to read this.